Wednesday, May 18, 2005

People Pot Pie

Well, our Battle Royale has its ups and downs, the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. Let's recap:

Round 1:
Keanu Reeves vs. Carol Channing
Winner: Carol Channing

Round 2:
Carol Channing vs. Turkey Pot Pie
Winner: Turkey Pot Pie

Round 3:
Turkey Pot Pie vs. Gandalf
Winner: Turkey Pot Pie

Round 2 got rather heated. Trash was talked. Tricks were played. Then, let's face it, Round 3 kind of fizzled. I'm principally to blame. Gandalf clearly did not excite this crowd (I spend way to much time around geeks, so my sense of what's interesting is warped). But why should I choose the contenders? Down with patriarchy. Up with people. This blog is your blog.

So, I humbly suggest that you choose. Send an e-mail with your proposed contender to:

And if your contender wins? Fame, glory, and boundless wealth shall be yours (or something like that). My only request is that you try to keep it sporting and make it a fair match (stay in the same "weight class", so to speak - so ringers such as "sex" and "a bijillion dollars" - or "sex on a bijillion dollars" - would be excluded). Beyond that, anything goes.

Let the games begin.

Update (and clarification):
Sorry. Apparently I don't explain things well because I'm dumb. The ideas is that you would propose a single contender (you would "sponsor" that contender, as it were). From the various submissions, I would then select one of them to challenge the existing champion in the current round (if yours is not chosen in the current round, it might show up in a later round). For example, if you proposed "rubber vomit" and I selected "rubber vomit" as the challenger for Round 4, then Round 4 would be Turkey Pot Pie vs. Rubber Vomit. If, for some godforsaken reason, "rubber vomit" won, then kudos to you, and "rubber vomit" would be the new champion. In Round 5, "rubber vomit" would be pitted against a new contender proposed by somebody else. Make sense? Certainly not. But that's the idea.


  1. shades of 'on the waterfront'

  2. Turkey Pot Pie vs. Martinis. I want to see if Caswell will still remain devoted to his TPP. Or, better, TPP vs. Gin Fizz.

  3. An excellent suggestion.

  4. ok I realize it's way too late to contribute to this, but I honestly think rubber vomit is the greatest thing ever.