Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Emoter in Chief

How was the President’s speech last night?* Was he angry enough? Because I’ve been watching the news, and apparently if he gets angry enough, it’ll stop the leak.**

* I was busy doing more important things—like hanging out with a dear friend who's contemplating leaving the city, who feel's that Katrina was enough and this is too much. Talk about mad, sick, and sad.

** I confess I’m a little fuzzy on the science, but hundreds of talking heads can’t be wrong. How would that work?
"I want to know whose ass to kick."

"Angier, Mr. President! Angrier!"

"I want... to tear them a new one."

"Angier!"

"Fuck-you-you-fucking-fucks-how-could-you-be-so-fucking-stupid-because-although-I'm-no-fucking-oil-expert............"

"It’s working, Mr. President! It’s working!"
Though once his unflappable exterior was ruptured, we’d have the new problem of figuring out how to stop his gushing flow of curse-laden vitriol.

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