Monday, May 01, 2006

Slimbo's Jazz Fest Report

Um... I didn't go. And, there's a pretty good chance I won't go.* Sorry.

Go ahead. Throw your Teevas and hacky-sacks at the computer screen. Call me a traitor ("Have you no shame? This year of all years..."). I won't argue. I'm just (probably) not doing it.

Mardi Gras crowds make me giddy and ecstatic. Jazz Fest crowds (and the ever-soaring ticket prices) make me crotchety and irritable. Can someone explain this to me?

* Of course, I say this every year and somehow haven't missed one yet, so we'll see...


  1. Anonymous2:38 PM

    I have wondered about you and your wife's disdain for Jazzfest. Part of me feels like you love Mardi Gras so much that there's nothing left for Jazzfest. Maybe it is a reaction to the many silly people who say, "I don't like Mardi Gras. I'm all about JAZZFEST!"

    Yesterday, as I was standing watching people dance funny, with dumb matching Jazzfest outfits (see Nolanik's blog for pictures), I thought, "This is why Slim doesn't like Jazzfest and I can relate."

    Then, when I am standing not too far from the stage watching Allen Toussaint play with Elvis Costello, all the sandals, flags on the ends of fishing poles, and vintage jazzfest t-shirts disappear. It is just too damn good to let that bother you. You would have liked it, I promise.

  2. Anonymous3:12 PM

    It's probably due to the clothing choices that you make for Jazzfest. Try to expand your wardrobe or at least modify it slightly for Jazzfest.

  3. Anonymous5:45 PM

    Honestly. I'm also baffled by your feelings. I think the clue is in the hacky-sack comment. Really, now, it's about the music, right? Not how people dress or look (or smell). There's just so much good music going on, who cares if you don't like the shoes of the guy standing next to you. Just go & enjoy the festival in the spirit it was intended. You don't let the drunk frat boys bother you at Mardi Gras, do you?
    One difference between the two that I have noticed has to do with the economics of the two events. Mardi Gras is free. Jazzfest costs $40. It's a different kind of fun when you are paying for it vs celebrating a citywide free event. But that doesn't mean that its LESS fun, just a different kind of fun.

  4. Yeah, the clothes alone would put the crotch in crotchety.

  5. I'll bet you an oyster po' boy that you'll go and hear Fats!

  6. ANYWAY!
    It's a strange kind of discomfort one feels with the overly emphatic fester, but s/he is in the same family as the costumer at Mardi Gras. It's just the cousin- who-doesn't-share-the-same-values kind of thing.
    It's what I love about New Orleans: it is a place for the overly emphatic. For good or for bad...but what treasures!
    I for one always find a crowd-watching reason to find a good thing about Jazz Fest.

    And of course, the meat pies.

  7. I was all set to work up an elaborate response defending my cool-cred, but Nikki beat me to the punch and said everything I meant to say (only shorter and better).

    It's really not disdain. I've had numerous wonderful moments there. And it's really not anti-hippie snobbery (although you have to allow me a little bit of hippie-baiting fun - hippies are hilarious). Like Nikki, I love the people watching. The people watching is what drags me back year after year despite my grump.

    It's just temperment. Something about my brain goes into overload when immersed in the particular set of stimuli that the Fest provides. I'm sure Doctor Jeff could bust out his Scan-o-tron 3000 and break it all down for us: "You will observe that Slimbo's Fest-lobe produces insufficient Fest-rogen...".

    And the kids are at a point where they really do make it tough. Standing in the kiddie village in the baking sun watching Louise do art projects, which she could do for free at home in the air-conditioning, while June goes on a heat-stroke-induced crying jag, well, I don't love it. This will change, but it's where we're at right now.

    Marco, you might win that po-boy. But even if I do go, there will be no deviation in the wardrobe!

  8. Anonymous9:38 AM

    Maybe you could dress up as an overproducer of "festrogen" for Halloween instead?

  9. Clinically speaking, perhaps abnormal levels of Festrogen are associated with the status of being a Festal virgin?

    This calls for further study. Or, barring that, a humorously labelled graph.

  10. Anonymous2:42 PM

    graph! graph! graph! graph!