Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! (That Cigarette)

Speaking of John [Cougar]* Mellencamp, did you know he smokes (smoked?) five packs of cigarettes a day? Five! Five! It’s true. I saw it on tee-vee. They mentioned it in a VH1 special, and I don’t think there was single shot in the entire show when he didn’t have a lit cigarette in hand.

At one point, he was talking about how he was really getting healthy, eating well, and whatnot (but hadn't stopped smoking). Um, I’m sorry to have to mention this, but you can consume every essential vitamin, guzzle wheatgrass smoothies until the cows come home, have the shiniest, freshest colon in the whole wide world, and it ain’t gonna do you a damn bit of good if your lungs look like little, burnt embers of coal.

* Deprecated.**

** Geek-baiting.


  1. Shouldn't that be @deprecated?

    (I suppose it depends on how much java you've got at the coffice.)

    My apologies in advance to anyone not on this particular RDF, but consider me baited.

  2. Anonymous8:40 PM

    Is your title a reference to the song "take! take! take! (your medicine)" by my favorite band, the Imagination Movers?!

  3. Somewhere I heard that Yves Saint-Laurent smokes (smoked?) SEVEN packs a day. Way I fgure it, a cigarette takes about six or seven minutes to smoke. Seven times twenty is 140 cigs--multiply that by seven minutes and you've got, what, more than 16 hours a day devoted to smoking? Awesome.
    Does he smoke more than one at a time?
    Does he pay lackeys to keep lit cigarettes in every room of his house, just in case he walks in?

    I really want a cigarette now.

  4. I am sorry for the "Cougar" and Yves St-Laurent. I know what a devastating habit smoking can be. I smoked for 30 consecutive years before I stopped. I wrote about it on a post entitled "Cigarette" dated May 7th on my blog "Politics and the Law" at hladdie.blogspot.com

  5. All, Java all the time, bay-bee!

    And HLS, yes we have our little giddy chuckle at the outrageousness of five (or seven) packs a day, but in the end it's just miserably sad.

  6. And Teresa: Imagination Movers, Tex Williams, practically the same thing.

  7. Anonymous1:30 PM

    One of my patients said he has been smoking forever. Wow, that must have a shock to mom when he lit up as soon as he popped out!!